


discordant (it was never going to be easy, was it?)

by roanhorse



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/F, Fantasy, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-11-03 15:39:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17880524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roanhorse/pseuds/roanhorse
Summary: She does not look like the person you fell in love with.





	discordant (it was never going to be easy, was it?)

Who was she before she met you?

When she stops smiling her face is not one you know.

When she puts on her impossibly heavy armor and takes up her godlight sword she becomes a different person and it makes you afraid that you fell in love with a person that does not exist.

The lines in her face have become deeper, her features chiseled from steel and marble. Her eyes are cold and they burn with every glance.

The weight of seven worlds rests heavy on her broad shoulders, the burden bound with ancient blood and bone. When she looks at you you can’t seem to remember the last time she was ever happy—

and your face creases with worry.

But she always comes back to herself, California sun in a world of gods and monsters. her smile lights a fire in you and you pray ( _not to the gods, they’re a bunch of rat bastards_ ) that she’ll choose to stop fighting, lay down her bloody shield and blade and take your outstretched hand and go with you, far far away.

But she doesn’t. She muscles her way onto the frontlines and she hacks her way through the hordes of beasts around her with a fierceness that scares you. 

And you can only watch as her sandals become soaked in gore, and her hair becomes matted with sweat and gristle.

She does not look like the person you fell in love with.

But you stay with her because—

every day she looks at your face and she smiles and smiles and smiles, even though one of your eyes is half closed all the time, even though you can’t quite talk because half your mouth has burned away, and even though your gaze doesn’t have the spirit it once did when she first met you.

And she still stays with _you_ despite the fact you can’t cast a spell without it failing once or twice beforehand and can’t hold your staff without your scarred fingers trembling. 

You are not the person she fell in love with.

You are not the determined merchant with the power of a god and a heart of gold that she once knew before. 

You do not have that charm, that courage that moves worlds—that _spark_ —anymore.

Instead, you are a broken girl with a marred face and a eye that doesn’t work right.

And every time she looks at you, her face creases with worry.

And you know what she’s thinking.

_This is not the person i fell in love with._

But she stays with you anyway.

And even though you do not recognize her 

( _You wake up and startle at her sleeping face_ )

nor she you

( _When she catches sight of you when she’s dead tired her hand reaches for her sword before she can stop herself_ )

you catch yourself falling in love with her again.

**Author's Note:**

> found this in my tumblr drafts and decided to post it. inspired by the various, mediocre isekai novels i've suffered through in my middle school years.
> 
> here's to my first drabble on ao3, about broken lesbians in a world away from home. because of course it is.


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